Throughout my life, I’ve always heard that saying “Guys and girls can never be just friends.” While growing up, one of my best friends was a guy. I’ve never really seen him as anything more than a friend and a bhai. People always questioned my relationship with him, making more out of it than what it really was. But to us, it was just an innocent friendship.
I used to always say,
He’s just my best friend, and if my future partner can’t accept him as my best friend, than it will never work out.”
I never understood why guys would get jealous of me having a guy best friend. I lived in a dream world, where I thought everything had innocence to it. However, as I matured and went through my fair share of relationships, I realized that I want my partner to become my best friend. Does that mean I should fall in love with my childhood best friend? No! What I’m saying is, two people who evolve into a relationship can also become best friends. I want my partner to be my best friend. My soul mate.
Throughout life, you will meet one person who is unlike any other. This person is one you could forever talk to. They understand you in a way that no one else does or even could. This person is your soul mate, your best friend. Don’t ever let them go”-Pamela Ann
I’ve realized that in order to have a stable relationship, your partner should be your best friend. Your rock. Your number one. It’s important to have a friends circle outside of your relationship, however, your partner should be the one person you can count on to turn your frown upside down.
He or she should be there to wipe away the tears in your eyes and to make fun of you when you do something silly. The beauty of being in love with your best friend is the fact that you can totally be yourself, and not have to worry about impressing each other. They accept you for who you are, flaws and all.
So how come people who are best friends find it difficult to delve into a relationship? What’s stopping them from taking the next step? It should be easy, right?
There’s a difference between friendship and relationships. It’s because, we as women, like to categorize most things in our life, including our friends. Once we’ve placed our male friends in the “friend zone” or the “rakhi zone,” it can become very difficult to cross those boundaries.
Let’s take my story as an example: I grew up with a male best friend, but I couldn’t possibly imagine him being anything more than just a friend. But, to the outside world, it seemed so simple.
“He’s your best friend, so why not?”
Why not? Because, that’s just it – he’s my best friend. Key word: FRIEND. I’ve placed him in that “rakhi/friend zone.” I’ve also learnt to accept the fact that he may not always continue to be my best friend, but he’ll always be a close friend of mine.
Is it possible to fall in love with your best friend? Yes, and if you’re one of those lucky ones who have fallen in love with their best friends, than appreciate the beauty in it. You may not want to cross the friendship zone into dating because you are scared of what will happen to the friendship. But, you never know, it may make things easier, knowing that you are still best friends first, then partners.
However, I’m lucky enough to have met someone who eventually became a best friend. He wasn’t my childhood friend. He wasn’t even a friend.
So, for those of you who haven’t found your best friend yet, keep an open mind. You never know what friendship could turn into a relationship. Live in the now, and not by the standards of society. Break the rules. Live, but most importantly, learn to love with all your heart, and the rest will fall into place.
Did you fall in love with your best friend? Or did you find someone who eventually became your best friend? Share your story in the comment section below.